Tag ABC Bachelorette Recaps

Bachelorette Hannah Recap: My Bologna Has a First Name

I think the only way we are going to get through the remaining episodes of Hannah’s journey to potentially screw up her life is through the power of camaraderie, deep breathing exercises, and watching old clips of Sean Lowe’s season on YouTube.  We must stand strong, people. In the epic words of the students in High School Musical, “We’re all in this together.” SIMPLE DISCLAIMER The following information you are

Continue reading…

Bacheorette Hannah Recap: 40 Minutes of Drama

I am a professional Bachelor franchise recapper. Since 2003, I have settled in front of my television to watch someone’s journey to find love. There are definitely highs. There are certainly lows. I scream. I rejoice. I once did a little dance.  I’ve learned what’s attractive (kiss up against the wall) and what’s not (calling yourself ABC), but never in my sixteen years of doing this have I been somewhat

Continue reading…

Bachelorette Hannah Recap: The Luke Ness Monster

Last week I was really worried about Bachelorette Hannah. She appeared to have a permanent seat on the struggle bus. Her picker seemed to be off kilter and her inability to recognize the giant red flag waving in her face was concerning. This week, I’m worried about the guys. First of all, the hero hair has taken a life of its own. Is the damp Highland climate causing it to

Continue reading…

Bachelorette Hannah Recap: Luke Goes Red Ross

I’m worried about Hannah, y’all. She’s majorly on the struggle bus and it doesn’t look like she’s hopping off any time soon. I’m sure the producers thought that a change of scenery might do her good, which is why the swept her off to Boston while the rest of the cast and crew went to Newport, but she’s still a hot mess. PS: That’s what makes this show so, so

Continue reading…

Bachelorette Hannah Recap: Party Queen

It’s been two months since Miss Alabama Hannah officially bested her arch nemesis Caelyn by taking the coved title of ABC’s new bachelorette. As Caelyn shops for scantily clad bikinis between extra hours of cardio in prep for her stint on Bachelor in Paradise, Hannah can be found on a deserted soundstage shooting mysterious reality show promos, walking through an enchanted forest in an ice blue plant suit. It’s clear

Continue reading…

  • 1 6 7