Bachelorette Tayshia Finale Recap: Clarky and the Queen

Bachelorette Tayshia Finale Recap |

It feels weird writing about Tayshia’s journey to find love on the cusp of the Baby Jesus entering this world, yet here we are folks. In former seasons, I’ve never had to frantically slap something together moments before getting on the road for some well-deserved Yuletide cheer! 

I’m not going to be a Grinch about it and ditch the recap altogether, yet I am on a schedule. It’s not like I have a train to catch or that I’m going over the river and through the woods to grandmother’s house, but I do need to make this snappy. Therefore, I will be hitting the high notes so we can all get on with forgoing the fruitcake in a tin can in place of something drizzled with chocolate. 

My hope is that it will be joyful and triumphant.

FANTASY SUITES

Look, the fantasy suite episode is always aco taco. What I appreciate about our three guys standing is that they call a spade a spade. IT IS HELLA STRANGE, AND NO ONE SHOULD ADDRESS THE ELEPHANT IN THE EL PRESIDENTE.

First up is Ivan and let me tell you, dear reader, he gets the shaft. My boy has to sit with Tayshia in an ice bath and kiss for more than six minutes to beat a world record. I have so many questions. 

  1. Who is the person who once thought, “Hey, after perusing the latest copy of the Guinness Book of World Records, I noticed there wasn’t an ice bath kissing entry. Let’s do that!”
  2. I understand that it is hotter than the surface of the sun outside, and an ice bath may sound appealing at the moment when your skin is dripping off your face. Still, hyperthermia is a real condition, and I feel we need all of our fingers to pop open champagne bottles. 
  3. How is this fun? Why is this a date? 

To make matters worse, once Ivan thaws and agrees to forgo his individual room, Tayshia gleefully escorts him to an airstream trailer in the middle of the resort. Does it have air conditioning? We don’t know. Is there running water? I pray, that is the case. Can Ivan stand up straight once inside? Nope. Will his legs hang off the end of the square bed? You bet. 

The next morning, Tayshia and Ivan seem off, but it isn’t until later that we learn why. Apparently, they had a “religion talk,” and things did not go as planned. (More on that later.)

Zac’s date is the opposite of Ivan’s date. He gets to rub paint all over Tayshia’s practically naked body and roll around on a canvas. We call this “art” in Bachelor Nation. Zac tells the camera no less than ten times that he’s falling in love with Tayshia and wants her to be his wife. She seems pretty excited about him, too.

That night at dinner, Zac tells Tayshia all the wonderful things he loves about her and how she “turned on a light” inside of him. They make out for a very long time and forgo their rooms to fantasy the night away. The frolicking continues the next morning. Tayshia is clearly feeling Zac more than Ivan, based solely on her willingness to jump on the bed the next morning in post-coital bliss. 

Then we see Brendan, and all of the world sighs. It’s clear that Brendan is about to puke and couldn’t care less that Neil Lane is dragging out different engagement bands for Tayshia to squeal over. Brendan literally does not say a word for fear that vomit will issue forth from his mouth should he open it. 

Tayshia feels him backing away and addresses the situation at dinner that night in her tin foil dress that helps the entire resort get free HBO in their rooms.

In a nutshell, Brendan tells Tayshia that he thought he was ready for marriage until Uncle Neil waved diamonds under his nose. He feels that there is still a big part of his heart that is broken, and he needs time to heal and grow. He wants to give her his whole heart, and as he sits there, he knows his heart isn’t anywhere near whole.

Of course, Tayshia can’t stop him from tapping out and doesn’t want a man who isn’t ready for the long haul. They hug and cry and wish each other well. Brendan strolls off to the rejection SUV, wiping tears with the edge of his signature mock turtleneck. 

BEN RETURNS

If you’re keeping score, you realize that there are two roses and two people left. Easy peasy, right?

Wrong. 

Ben shows up and begs Harrison to see Tayshia because he needs to tell her IN THAT MOMENT that he loves her. Is she currently about to leave the El Presidente to go to a rose ceremony? Of course, she is, silly. This is perfect timing.

Ben knocks on Tayshia’s door, and she almost swallows her tongue. So does Ben when he sees the dress she’s wearing. To say that the front had a “keyhole opening” is the biggest understatement of the year. It wasn’t even a cold cleavage dress. It was a cold half boob dress, and I found it very distracting. WHERE DO I LOOK?

Ben asks her to sit with him and I laugh. It’s not really a sitting dress, Ben, but okay. He spills all of his feelings out onto the floor and watches as Tayshia’s emotions flicker from anger to confusion to irritation and back to anger. 

For some reason, she kisses him at the door and invites him to the FREAKING ROSE CEREMONY. Ivan and Zac are shocked when he rolls in with his ill-fitting suit, bragging that Tayshia asked him to come.

Tayshia arrives and asks for a private audience with Ivan. She takes him to the breakup bench, and they agree that their “religious differences” are the cause of their ultimate demise. No one has any idea what they are talking about, and we frantically ask each other, “Did I miss a religion conversation somewhere in the airstream?”

We didn’t miss it, but it did happen. There are several theories out there swirling around the Internet right now. However, I would suggest listening to Kaitlyn Bristowe’s podcast since Ivan told a former Bachelorette contestant that he spills the tea on her show. 

All that to say, Ivan is gone and Ben is in the finals with Zac.

MEET THE PARENTS

There isn’t much to report here, other than the fact that Tayshia’s brothers are about as adorable as they come. Her mom and dad are anxious about her getting hurt again, and they never want Tayshia to feel that heartbreak again. So they have decided to tell her that over and over and over.

Ben impresses the parents with his diploma from West Point. Zac wins them over with his ability to communicate his feelings without coming across as disingenuous or cheesy. A problem arises when Tayshia’s dad comes over the next day to warn his daughter about how she’s not in her twenties, and she doesn’t have the time for this one “not to work.” This sends Tayshia into an emotional down-spiral, hyperventilating in her kicky denim romper. 

SINGLE DATES

Zac notices Tayshia’s odd behavior immediately as they learn a ballroom dance from two kitchen staff who happen to learn to foxtrot from an old Dancing with the Stars VHS tape they found in the Everything Storage Closet. He tries to make her laugh, but her daddy’s words bounce around in her head with every promenade. 

That night, Zac takes the bull by the horns and listens as Tayshia worries about everything that could go wrong. What if he’s attracted to her independence but then feels annoyed when she wants to be a stay-at-home mom in five years? Also, she’s used to people running away, and how does she know he will stay through all the hard stuff?

Zac handles the moment beautifully. He begins by sharing with Tayshia that that day is an anniversary for him. He’s nine years sober. It’s the most important thing in his life and has taught him how NOT to run away. You have to face life. And if he gets the chance to propose, it’s not for a day or the rest of the year. It’s for life—a commitment to loyalty and honesty. 

There was so much sincerity. He’s so good and kind. Not to mention, he’s a grown A$$ man.

BEN

Poor Ben. Tayshia rips the Band-Aid and tells Ben that she has “fallen for someone else.” (Duh. I wonder who that could be?)

Ben is shocked for the second time on this journey and feels terrible that he won’t get to have Tayshia as his wife. Thanks to the well-timed shower scene, I feel Ben will do fine in Paradise. How many rock hard abs did you count?

THE PROPOSAL

For the next thirty minutes, we get a glimpse into both Tayshia and Zac’s life as they prepare for a proposal in the worst setting we’ve had in the history of the show. Not only are there dead brush and crusty palm trees splayed all over the hot desert sand, but the ABC Intern unwisely set a few fires here and there for presumable ambiance. 

I blame a heat stroke. It’s the only reason he would endanger everyone’s lives on the resort by lighting a match near all that kindling. 

Tayshia cries to Harrison because she’s so happy. Zac cries to Tayshia because he’s so happy. I cry because these two kids are going to make it for sure. 

What do you think? Was Zac the true winner? Do you feel sad for Ivan? Was Ben really shocked that Tayshia didn’t pick him?

And how do you feel about Matt’s season debuting in two weeks? From the looks of his promo, I think we have a few problem children in the cast. 

I’m so excited!

Photo By: abc.com
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Cathy Denis
Cathy Denis
December 23, 2020 3:07 pm

I wasn’t a huge Zac fan – he is not my jam BUT you could tell she loved him. What irritated me was that right around the time Brendan left Tayshia was on camera saying Brendan was the one and I think she said she loved him or was falling in love with him AND she told Ivan that she was falling in love with him too. So I wasn’t real impressed with all of that at the time but I did think Zac was super sincere and I did like their connection. I did believe Zac and T’s love and I am rooting for them. I too wish they had given us a bit more of a back story about the religion thing with Ivan – I was like ‘huh?’ It came out of nowhere and was so convenient. Good luck to them though and looking forward to BIP where hopefully we’ll see Bennett (he’s just funny to me) and Ben and not Noah although you know they’ll both be there.

Sara P.
Sara P.
December 24, 2020 12:28 pm
Reply to  Cathy Denis

I liked Noah! I thought he actually did a pretty good job of dealing with Bennett’s condescending ways (I liked Bennett as well, until he pulled out the book and started lecturing Noah on emotional intelligence). I hope Noah does show up on Bachelor in Paradise – I think that would be a good environment for him.

Teri
Teri
December 23, 2020 4:32 pm

Zac is probably the most self-aware man she could have chosen in light of what he’s gone through in his recovery. I have confidence they’ll make it.

Mallory
Mallory
December 23, 2020 7:31 pm

Great recap! Did anyone else notice that she had the same denim dress on for both her convo with her dad and then her breakup with Ben, which supposedly came the day after Zac’s date? I find that really odd. Why would she wear the same dress twice? Maybe the producers misled us about the order of events? Maybe she had her breakup with Ben, then her chat with her dad, then the date with Zac? Who knows.
Also, I found it very telling that Ben said TWICE that what he loves about Tayshia is “the way she makes him feel.” Um, that has nothing to do with what he loves about HER.

Vicki
Vicki
December 24, 2020 6:37 pm
Reply to  Mallory

Yes! When all Ben could express was how Tayshia “made him feel,” that concerned me, too. Feelings change ALL the time, and saying that you love someone because of how they make you FEEL puts the responsibility of the relationship on them. What Ben describes sounds like infatuation. Although I wasn’t initially a Zac fan, he really grew on me. He is very articulate, and did a great job of holding his own with Tayshia’s father.

I like this couple better than any we’ve been presented with for many seasons. I think they actually have a shot at making it. I truly hope so.

I know the timing was problematic, but actually really missed having an ATFR episode this time.

Mallory
Mallory
December 24, 2020 4:50 am

Also, just FYI Lincee, this post doesn’t show up on the home page or the recaps page. I have to go to last week’s recap and click the “Bachelorette” link to find this one.

Yanet
Yanet
December 24, 2020 10:28 pm
Reply to  Mallory

I had a really hard time finding it too. Not the first time. Glad I finally was able to work my way to it a day later and didn’t give up.

Dee
Dee
December 27, 2020 2:29 am
Reply to  Mallory

I had the same issue. I had to go and do a Google search to see if you had done any kind of finale recap. This has happened a couple of times this season. Not sure what is going on with your website . . . ?

Vicki
Vicki
December 24, 2020 6:43 pm

Ohmigosh! In what world is an Airstream trailer a fantasy suite?!

On a totally different note, every time the rejection SUV came to cart someone away, I wondered if they were actually leaving the compound or if that was just for show. Because it seemed like no one was actually leaving!

lm3js
lm3js
December 28, 2020 2:42 pm

Was watching this last episode with my teen son and had a very awkward convo about that keyhole dress. Neither one of us could look away. Real talk ha ha. In the end, I wasn’t really invested in any of them nor thought any were a good fit for her. I think they are all fine people, however.

DonnaMarie
DonnaMarie
January 3, 2021 1:45 pm

Since when did picking out rings with NL become an actual date? Talk about getting ripped off! Poor Brendan! Neil must have something good on someone to be elevated to that amount of air time!

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